try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Randomize
