If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
operation harelip BJ is a go
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Randomize
