plz talk dirty to me
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
