I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
