got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
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