Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
They should really pass out barf bags in church
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Randomize
