You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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