the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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