You're completely useless in the revolution.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Randomize
