Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Randomize
