Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
