He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Randomize
