fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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