I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Randomize
