I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
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