May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
