I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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