I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize
