3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
