What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Randomize