I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
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