Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
