that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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