I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
