Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
