is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Randomize
