you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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