I want to stick my p in your. b.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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