I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
