"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Randomize
