fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
