...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
