Sponge bath it is.
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
