the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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