Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
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