is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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