if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize