Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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