I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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