Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Randomize
