You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
