Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
