Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize
