"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
