I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Randomize
