My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
