lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Randomize
