Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
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