Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
