i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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